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Today's Teenager

Roy Petitfils, LPC has worked with teenagers for over 20 years. He shares insights and tips to help adults understand, reach and influence today's teenagers.
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Today's Teenager
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Sep 23, 2016

This week, Roy breaks down three of the biggest parenting fears he hears about from other parents and experiences in his own parenting. These fears, Roy says, are those that are not frequently discussed directly among other adults.

Fears of our children missing out, rejection by other parents, and judgment from other parents often lead some parents to isolate themselves and burden themselves with heavy and unhealthy shame. Roy stresses the importance of moving past through denial by naming and addressing the fears that a parent faces as they navigate the treacherous waters of their children's teenage years. 


To get Roy's newest ebook "Little Book of Questions that Really Get Teens Talking" go to todaysteenager.com and sign up or email Roy at roy@todaysteenager.com.

Today's Teenager podcast is produced for educational and entertainment purposes only. It is not intended to nor should it be used as a replacement for professional counseling

Sep 16, 2016

In this episode, Roy addresses the need that teens have for attention from and the mindful presence of the adults in their lives. Roy shares his own experiences of feeling invisible and unnoticed as a teen and how that has informed his awareness of the dynamics of positive and negative attention in a teen's relationship with the adults in their lives. 

Roy offers three methods that can help adults be more aware, attentive, and present to the teens in their lives, with a focus on the importance of careful listening to ministering to and loving young people. 

To get Roy's newest ebook "Little Book of Questions that Really Get Teens Talking" go to todaysteenager.com and sign up or email Roy at roy@todaysteenager.com.

Today's Teenager podcast is produced for educational and entertainment purposes only. It is not intended to nor should it be used as a replacement for professional counseling

Sep 9, 2016

In this episode, Roy continues to explore the concept of "parenting from the inside out," which means parenting from a less utilitarian and more introspective place. Roy expands on this idea by illustrating how adults can begin to see not only what they can do for their children but what the gift and journey of parenting can do for their own personal development and relationship with God. Roy explains that this perspective can enlighten those tough times in parenting, especially those involving difficult issues like gender identity and sexuality. 

To get Roy's newest ebook "Little Book of Questions that Really Get Teens Talking" go to todaysteenager.com and sign up or email Roy at roy@todaysteenager.com.

Today's Teenager podcast is produced for educational and entertainment purposes only. It is not intended to nor should it be used as a replacement for professional counseling.

Sep 6, 2016

In this episode, Roy explores what he calls "parenting from the inside out," a philosophy which means approaching parenting with mindfulness and intent, reflecting on what motivates our actions, reactions, behaviors, and values as parents.

Roy says parents can come to learn how God is working on them as adults through their own experience of parenting, and that God may be using parenting as a way of healing and transforming the parent instead of the child.  Roy also shares examples of this philosophy through examples from his parenthood and childhood.  

To get Roy's newest ebook "Little Book of Questions that Really Get Teens Talking" go to todaysteenager.com and sign up or email Roy at roy@todaysteenager.com.

Today's Teenager podcast is produced for educational and entertainment purposes only. It is not intended to nor should it be used as a replacement for professional counseling.

Aug 29, 2016

In this episode, Roy talks with Catholic musician, speaker, and author Chris Padgett. Chris uses storytelling, comedy, and music to bring his unique take on the Gospel to an international  audience.

Chris has written six books on a variety of topics, including marriage, the Eucharist, and Marian spirituality. Chris is also an accomplished musician with a number of albums to his credit.

Roy and Chris discuss a range of topics, including how Chris' experiences as a teen influence his ministry today, current trends among young people and in youth ministry, and Chris' message for adults who work with teens.

Click here for more about Chris, including photos of his 9 - sided home mentioned in this episode, links to his books and albums, contact information,  and more.

 
To get Roy's newest ebook "Little Book of Questions that Really Get Teens Talking" go to todaysteenager.com and sign up or email Roy at roy@todaysteenager.com.

Today's Teenager podcast is produced for educational and entertainment purposes only. It is not intended to nor should it be used as a replacement for professional counseling.

Aug 23, 2016

In this episode, Roy explores how the concept of "the one thing" can enhance working with teens and other young people. The notion of "the one thing" suggests that success can be found by applying greater focus and direction towards a singular goal or aspect of a person's life. This idea has circulated in the popular consciousness for some time, including books on business and success like Gary Keller's "The One Thing."

Roy encourages adults who interact with teens to devote themselves to learning what a teen's greatest need or "one thing is" through mindfulness, attention, and presence.  Roy then suggests Gary Chapman's "Five Love Languages" ( Words of Affirmation, Quality Time, Receiving Gifts, Acts of Service, and Quality Time) can be powerful tools for engaging, loving, and serving teens by recognizing and fulfilling their various needs.  

To get Roy's newest ebook "Little Book of Questions that Really Get Teens Talking" go to todaysteenager.com and sign up or email Roy at roy@todaysteenager.com.

Today's Teenager podcast is produced for educational and entertainment purposes only. It is not intended to nor should it be used as a replacement for professional counseling.

Aug 19, 2016

In this episode, Roy explores the sometimes confusing nature of teen personality development. Roy explains that the formative nature of a teenager's personality leads to rapid changes, some of which will seem alarming to adults. At the heart of a teenager's personality is an adaptive quality that is  based on various situations and interactions with other people, which Roy says is normal for every teenager and is even something found in adult behavior. 

Roy also addresses the hesitance and fear that some adults fear in acknowledging some changes in teens. Roy strongly encourages adults to avoid condescension and patronizing teens and instead offering support through attentive presence and availability. 

To get Roy's newest ebook "Little Book of Questions that Really Get Teens Talking" go to todaysteenager.com and sign up or email Roy at roy@todaysteenager.com.

Today's Teenager podcast is produced for educational and entertainment purposes only. It is not intended to nor should it be used as a replacement for professional counseling.

Aug 16, 2016

In this week's episode, Roy explores the differences between logical and relational consequences in disciplining teenagers. While both types of consequences modify behavior, one is ultimately destructive and leads to shame. This shame and its effects are deep and lasting and can result in emotionally and psychologically damaged teens. Roy explains the differences between healthy guilt and shame, which can deeply affect a young person's sense of value and worth. 

Roy then offers five tips for administering logical consequences and avoiding emotional and relational consequences. Roy's tips help parents and other adults working with young people to be mindful of their own emotional states in light of a teen's violation of trust and to lovingly yet effectively resolve the situation. 

To get Roy's newest ebook "Little Book of Questions that Really Get Teens Talking" go to todaysteenager.com and sign up or email Roy at roy@todaysteenager.com.

Today's Teenager podcast is produced for educational and entertainment purposes only. It is not intended to nor should it be used as a replacement for professional counseling.

Aug 12, 2016

In this episode, Roy welcomes Doug Tooke. Doug is a former youth minister and current international speaker and Executive Director of Reach Youth Ministry. Doug is also the founder of Monarch Ministries, which offers an assortment of areas of youth ministry, family dynamics,  and leadership development.

Roy and Doug discuss a variety of topics, including the importance of encouraging authentic and healthy communication among teens and young adults, the importance of teaching young people how to pray, and the resources Doug draws from in his ongoing ministry. 

Click here to learn more about Doug and Monarch Ministries, as well as listen to Doug's podcast,  Renovo. 

Aug 9, 2016

In this episode, Roy offers insight into how parents can find a counselor for their teen. Roy first encourages parents to listen to episode 15 of Today's Teeanger or read this blog post, both of which address normal and abnormal teen behavior. These criteria can help assess whether or not a teen's behavior warrants the intervention of a counselor. As Roy explains, finances are an issue for most people looking for mental health care, so he recommends beginning with counselors on one's insurance plan and what mental health services are also covered. 

Roy then explains the difference psychologists, counselors, psychotherapists, LPCs (Licensed Professional Counselors), LMFT (Licensed Marriage & Family Therapists), LCSW (Licensed Counselor/Social Workers) and which of these specialists may be best for your family. He also addresses the resistance and fear that some teens will understandably associate with being asked to speak with a mental health professional and ways that parents can comfort and encourage teens to look at counseling as a path towards personal healing and development. 

To get Roy's newest ebook "Little Book of Questions that Really Get Teens Talking" go to todaysteenager.com and sign up or email Roy at roy@todaysteenager.com.

Today's Teenager podcast is produced for educational and entertainment purposes only. It is not intended to nor should it be used as a replacement for professional counseling.

Aug 5, 2016

In this episode of Today's Teenager, Roy examines the three needs that every parent has when it comes to caring for their children. Roy explains that these needs don't necessarily apply to caring for other people's children as they do for caring for one's own. A parent's need to provide, protect, and please their children may seem obvious, but are complicated by the new and often unpredictable changes to daily life as a result of a rapidly-changing modern world. 

Roy encourages parents to concentrate on the ways they do provide and care for their children rather than feeling anxiety over what they may not be doing. Being active in learning about a young person's interests and culture help to alleviate that anxiety. Roy also looks at how women struggle more with protecting their children and men with providing for them. Finally, Roy offers how powerful spending time with and being present to our children can be in the formative teenage years. 

To get Roy's newest ebook "Little Book of Questions that Really Get Teens Talking" go to todaysteenager.com and sign up or email Roy at roy@todaysteenager.com.

Today's Teenager podcast is produced for educational and entertainment purposes only. It is not intended to nor should it be used as a replacement for professional counseling.

Aug 2, 2016

In this episode, Roy explores the five 'hungers' or needs of today's teenagers. These needs are universal to all people, but as Roy explains, they are especially critical for young people during the formative years of adolescent development. Roy further explains how teens will fulfill the void created by unmet needs with anything they can, including unhealthy attachments and abuse. Roy also offers practical strategies for recognizing these needs in young people and how to provide and assist them in fulfilling these needs. 

To get Roy's newest ebook "Little Book of Questions that Really Get Teens Talking" go to todaysteenager.com and sign up or email Roy at roy@todaysteenager.com.

Today's Teenager podcast is produced for educational and entertainment purposes only. It is not intended to nor should it be used as a replacement for professional counseling.

Jul 29, 2016

 In this episode of Today's Teenager, Roy offers suggestions for both adults and teens in developing healthy and successful conversational skills. In an episode designed to be listened to by teens in particular, Roy explores the social components of initiating, sustaining, and engaging in conversation with peers and adults.

Roy discusses the fear of rejection and invisibility he sometimes felt as a teen himself, and how adults modeled and encouraged successful conversation. Roy delves into the elements critical to skillful communication, including awareness of other people, the art of attentive listening, and above all, the power of smiling in social interaction. 

To get Roy's newest ebook "Little Book of Questions that Really Get Teens Talking" go to todaysteenager.com and sign up or email Roy at roy@todaysteenager.com.

Today's Teenager podcast is produced for educational and entertainment purposes only. It is not intended to nor should it be used as a replacement for professional counseling.

Jul 26, 2016

In this episode, Roy discusses the different ways adults can help motivate apathetic, disengaged and unmotivated teen boys. By helping provide sources of external he motivation, adults can help adolescents gradually develop the internal motivation needed to succeed in life. 

To get Roy's newest ebook "Little Book of Questions that Really Get Teens Talking" go to todaysteenager.com and sign up or email Roy at roy@todaysteenager.com.

Today's Teenager podcast is produced for educational and entertainment purposes only. It is not intended to nor should it be used as a replacement for professional counseling.

Jul 22, 2016

In this episode, Roy sits down with Dan Jurek, the founder and director of Pax Renewal Center for Individual, Couple and Family Therapy, to discuss what he's found to be effective in working with today's teens. From many years of experience working with teens as a teacher, minister, administrator, collegiate dean, spiritual director and counselor and his own experience overcoming challenges as a teen, Dan shares how we can most effectively reach teens. 

Roy and Dan discuss the anxiety and stress epidemic that affects many of today's teens and families and practical suggestions for educators, parents, clergy and ministers to address anxiety in various settings. 

To get Roy's newest ebook "Little Book of Questions that Really Get Teens Talking" go to todaysteenager.com and sign up or email Roy at roy@todaysteenager.com.

Today's Teenager podcast is produced for educational and entertainment purposes only. It is not intended to nor should it be used as a replacement for professional counseling.

Jul 19, 2016

In this week's episode, Roy offers insight into the unique way that teens grieve and how it is similar to but also different from how adults grieve. Roy encourages adults to recognize that most teens will experience a 9 -15 month period of denial before finally confronting and processing their own grief. Roy also illustrates how critical peer presence and support is for teens when dealing with loss. Finally, Roy suggests things that adults should and should not say to a teenager that's grieving. 


To get Roy's newest ebook "Little Book of Questions that Really Get Teens Talking" go to todaysteenager.com and sign up or email Roy at roy@todaysteenager.com.

Today's Teenager podcast is produced for educational and entertainment purposes only. It is not intended to nor should it be used as a replacement for professional counseling.

Jul 14, 2016

In this episode of Today's Teenager, Roy addresses the recent violence and chaos in our country. Roy offers insight into how our own personal and communal fears lead to violence and offers practical tips for adults to employ in conversations with young people about these complex issues. 

To get Roy's newest ebook "Little Book of Questions that Really Get Teens Talking" go to todaysteenager.com and sign up or email Roy at roy@todaysteenager.com.

Today's Teenager podcast is produced for educational and entertainment purposes only. It is not intended to nor should it be used as a replacement for professional counseling.

Jul 12, 2016

In this episode of Today's Teenager, Roy discuss the differences between normal vs. abnormal teen behavior. Roy explains why a young person's experience as a teenager can be a tumultuous one and how difficult it is for parents to go along for the ride!

Roy offers three criteria to help adults determine if a teen's experience is falls within the normal range of adolescent development or if it indicates something more serious is going on. He discusses three practical suggestions adults can do to be more alert to signs of abnormal behavior and prevent problems before they start. 

To get Roy's newest ebook "Little Book of Questions that Really Get Teens Talking" go to todaysteenager.com and sign up or email Roy at roy@todaysteenager.com.

Today's Teenager podcast is produced for educational and entertainment purposes only. It is not intended to nor should it be used as a replacement for professional counseling.

Jul 8, 2016

In this episode of Today's Teenager, Roy speaks with Catholic educator and author, Katie Prejean. Katie is the author of "Room 24: Adventures of A New Evangelist." Roy and Katie discuss insights into the anxiety and apathy epidemic we're seeing today, and Katie's best resources to stay on top of teen trends and culture shifts. To find out more about Katie, read her blogs or contact her, visit her website at www.katieprejean.com. Click here to get her book. 

To get Roy's newest ebook "Little Book of Questions that Really Get Teens Talking" go to todaysteenager.com and sign up or

Jul 5, 2016

In this episode of Today's Teenager, Roy speaks with Catholic educator and author, Katie Prejean. Katie is the author of "Room 24: Adventures of A New Evangelist." Roy and Katie discuss Katie's recent marriage, her work as a Catholic speaker, and the critical lessons she's learned about evangelization in her work as a Catholic educator.  

To find out more about Katie, read her blogs or contact her, visit her website at www.katieprejean.com. Click here to get her book. 

To get Roy's newest ebook "Little Book of Questions that Really Get Teens Talking" go to todaysteenager.com and sign up or email Roy at roy@todaysteenager.com

Jun 30, 2016

In this episode Roy discusses why "telling teens what to do" does not work and offers a three step process, based in curiosity and listening, to help adults positively influence today's teenagers. 

To get Roy's newest ebook "Little Book of Questions that Really Get Teens Talking" go to todaysteenager.com and sign up or email Roy at roy@todaysteenager.com

Jun 27, 2016

Have you ever been worried about your teen because they didn't "open up" to you? Have you ever been frustrated because your teen shuts down and shuts you out? 

Roy shows you how to get these teens to open up through understanding, listening and creative communication. 

To get Roy's newest ebook "Little Book of Questions that Really Get Teens Talking" go to todaysteenager.com and sign up or email Roy at roypetitfils@gmail.com .

Jun 23, 2016

In this episode, Roy discusses five skills every adult needs to communicate with teenagers. He offers practical tips for applying each tool to improve communication with teens. 

To get Roy's newest ebook "Little Book of Questions that Really Get Teens Talking" go to todaysteenager.com and sign up or email Roy at roypetitfils@gmail.com 

Jun 20, 2016

In this episode, Roy illustrates the importance of social skills for teens and ways that adults can encourage and model appropriate social skills and responses for young people. 

For more about Roy, including contact information, click here to visit Today's Teenager.

Jun 16, 2016

In this episode, Roy offers practical tips and insight into ways adults can help teenagers set healthy limits and boundaries with time devoted to video gaming. He offers specific suggestions of what to say, not to say and helps parents navigate common pitfalls when it comes to setting, maintaining and enforcing rules for teens and their gaming. 

For more about Roy, including contact information, click here to visit Today's Teenager.

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